For the long
three years of you convincing me and about a yearlong lovely relationship we
had there was always this nagging and itching feeling that quietly devoured me.
I could never be the one close enough to
you with whom you could share the pain deep in your heart. I remember during
the last fight we had, I was gripped by the terror that it was the end of the blooming
amour. You said I was no one to you and that the only person you were close too
and cared about did not include me.
Deep inside I
felt happy as I held myself responsible for all the arguments you had with your
mom these days; I didn’t want to be the spoiler. She acquires a bigger segment
of your life which nobody ever can vigorously seize. I felt blown away by
fierce wind with emptiness. You didn’t realize what you had uttered and how
much your words had triggered deep in my heart. They were mere words for you
that dropped out of your mouth and disappeared. But for me it was an explosion
that got shivers down my spine my blood froze through my veins. You were the
only one for whom I could lose everything I had.
Things changed
gradually. Each day doesn’t remain the same. Change is the only constant thing in
the journey called life. I spend precious moments with you with a smile pasted
on my face; I was not the one you loved until the frosty midnight.
On our first
outing we got to know each other better when we spend an entire day together;
so much love around me still a hollow heart lying next to you. You spoke about
the fun, the memories the joy we had entire day; you realized I was numb. The
next moment you broke down. I can still hear the silence of that awful midnight
you held me against you and cried until you were breathless. You cried of how
much an important part I am in your life.
The tiny fluttering’s
in my heart that like a flame resided. It felt as if it rained after a
prolonged draught. Tears gushing out of my eyes, I held you so close as if we
were one soul. The frost of that midnight disappeared in your arms so warm and
cosy. My depths of despair captivated with your immense solicitude.
